The Art of Zen Living

The optimist says the glass is half full.

The pessimist says the glass is half empty.

I say the glass is dirty, and needs to be washed.

We all end up needing to do dishes.  While it’s greener and gets your dishes cleaner to do them by hand, most of us opt to use the dishwasher.  I know that dishwasher detergent is one of the items I’m constantly scanning for coupons for.  No more.  I recently found this great little post on home made dishwasher detergent:

Brown Thumb Mama: Making Dishwasher Detergent

One of the things I really liked about it was that the only “unusual” ingredients are items I use in my laundry detergent anyway, so I have them around the house.  The stuff works great, and as noted in the post, costs about 9 cents a load.  Here’s the basic recipe:

1 cup Washing soda
1/2 cup Baking soda
1/2 cup Borax

Directions: Dump in bowl, mix well.  Use 2 Tbs per load of dishes.

Simple tip: as soon as the rinse cycle is done, open the door to the dishwasher.  The dishes are hot from the hot water, and will dry themselves in just a few minutes if the humidity isn’t trapped in with them.

The bonus?  This hits all of my big three - simple, frugal and green!

Did you know you can make yogurt at home? I was a bit surprised, as I come from an urban background, and things as complicated as yogurt and bread must require special factories, right?  As it turns out, not so much.  Homemade yogurt is cheap, easy and there is as big a difference between homemade and store bought yogurt as there is between home baked and store bought bread.

You can make a basic yogurt, or you can take it an extra step (which is my preference) and drain off most of the whey to make a thick, Greek-style yogurt.  Pictured here served over some fresh, pureed blueberries, it makes a great breakfast, snack or side dish.

Perhaps the best thing about this article is that I had to take that picture for the front page, and as a result, I’m eating my way through it as I type.  It’s still a bit amazing to me that just yesterday, that scoop of tasty goodness was regular milk!

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The question I’ve been wrestling with for the past few months, that has come to a boil this week, is whether or not a smart phone affords enough value to be worth the extra monthly expense.  I was surprised to realize what the driving factor behind my decision has been.

For years now, I’ve worked in computer related industries.  I’ve also moved all over the country.  When you combine those two things, you end up with a lot of friends scattered all over the globe that have something in common: they’re all very “plugged in”.  Facebook, for example, has been fantastic for me.  I’m back in touch with people that I’d lost touch with years or decades ago.  From a social standpoint, it has a certain perfection all it’s own, but that’s another post.

I don’t remember when I joined Facebook.  I do remember that it was something I did because someone (and I don’t remember who anymore) badgered me about it.  I promptly proceeded to ignore it.  Then something odd happened.  People started finding me.  Little by little, more and more people were added to my list.  I’m picky about my Facebook list - if you aren’t someone that was actually a friend, then you don’t get added.  There are certain exceptions - a few of my sister’s friends, as an example, are on my list because I’ve met them a few times, and I’ve enjoyed the thoughts and comments they’d posted on my sister’s page.

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I promise not to make this a regular thing.  I am, however, fairly proud of this word I’ve just made up:

Committocracy:

Pronunciation: \kə-ˈmi- tok- krə-sē\

Function: noun

Date: 2008

Etymology: from the English committee and the Greek -kratia -cracy

1. A government run by committee, where truthiness is more important than fact.

Equanimity: Evenness of mind; that calm temper or firmness of mind which is not easily elated or depressed; patience; calmness; composure; as, to bear misfortunes with equanimity

That’s the dictionary’s definition of equanimity.  It’s a good definition.  I imagine that for an outside observer, this is what the 4th immesurable looks like.  But how do we get there?  What are the choices and actions that bring us to that point?  If that is what it looks like on the outside, what does it look like on the inside?

I believe that equanimity, from the inside, is a choiceless awareness.  Because it’s when we want to make a choice that we suffer.  It’s when we have a preference that we suffer.  If I go to a restuant and order a steak, I always ask for it medium rare.  Usually they bring it to me medium well, or worse.  I’m always disappointed.  It makes me a little grumpy.  I think about sending it back, but that would usually take too long, and they’d probably bring it back the same way.  So I cut into my steak, shaking my head the whole time, chew-chew-chewing it in a distracted manner, not paying much attention to it really, not really listening to my friends or family that I’m dining with, too focused on that not-medium-rare steak.

My whole evening is ruined.  Not because they didn’t bring my my steak exactly the way I want it - that food is just as capable of sustaining me no matter if it’s cooked rare or well done.  No, my evening is ruined because I had a preference.  I wanted my steak medium rare.

Choiceless awareness.  Perfect acceptance.  Neither being attracted nor repelled.  I think this is what is being talked about in the well know proverb:

“Before enlightenment; chop wood, carry water. After enlightenment; chop wood, carry water.”

Sympathetic Joy is the ability to be happy when other people are happy.  I know it’s a challenge for me.  Our culture is very competitive.  When we see someone succeed, or someone that is doing better than we are, it’s hard to think “Well, good for them!”. Reverand Kusala tells a story about sympathetic joy that I can really relate to.  He says sometimes, when we’re watching TV and we see the spot about the person that just won a million dollars, it’s hard to happy for that person.  Because I’m thinking “What if it had been me?  I could REALLY spend that money well.  That person is just going to blow it.  They’ll be broke in five years.  In debt, too!”.

That isn’t sympathetic joy.

That’s pretty much the opposite of sympathetic joy.  For most of us, it is the way our minds operate.

The Daili Lama makes an excellent point in favor of sympathetic joy.  He points out that if you can learn to be happy when someone else is happy, then you increase your own chance of happiness by a factor of 6.6 billion.  He’s saying that if you are willing to give up your own happiness, you will be happy anytime someone else is happy.  If you’re willing to give up your own success, you’ll be successful anytime anyone else is successful.

Wow.  Most cool.

This is also a really, really difficult level of spiritual practice to attain.  Watching my niece discover something new, the way her face lights up with unfiltered joy and amazement, my heart lights up with that same unfiltered joy and amazement.  I think we’ve all experienced, at some time, true sympathetic joy.  Can you imagine what an incredible place the world would be if you could feel that way no matter who you saw that was happy?

I’ve heard it said that Buddhism hasn’t done a very good job of changing the world.  I don’t think it’s designed to.  I think it’s designed to change those who practice it.  The premise is simple and profound: change your mind, change the world.  Not the physical world, but the world you live in.

Change your mind, change the world.  You can quote me on that.

Love and compassion are necessities, not luxuries. Without them humanity cannot survive.
Dalai Lama

While Loving Kindness is a mental state, Compassion is not.  Compassion is an action.  It is the activity of Loving Kindness.  Or, if you prefer a more groovy sort of feel, let’s say that Compassion is Loving Kindness arisen.  Except when it’s not.  That’s what I like about thinking of Compassion as an action.  You don’t have to be in a particularly compassionate mood, or even a good mood, really.

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It’s hard to pick out a “favorite” from the 4 immeasurables.  They’re all pretty groovy.  Loving Kindness is probably the easiest of the 4 to start practicing immediately.  Loving kindness is, to me, a head thing.  It’s an intention or an attitude.  It goes on inside you.  The word the Buddha used was metta.  I’ve seen it translated into English as many things - peaceful harmony, goodwill, benevolance, friendly well wishes, and the list goes on.  All of these are good translations, but “loving kindness” seems to be the most popular by far, and with good reason I think.

Loving Kindness can be taken separately to mean different things, or taken together to mean different things.  Between the concepts of love and of kindness, you can cover pretty much any and all positive mental mind states that occur in human nature.  It is the ultimate measure of the ends justifying the means.  If your intention is loving kindness, then whatever actions arise from those intentions will be pure.

I think the thing I like most about loving kindness is that it is really easy to generate.  I’ve written in the past about my Loving Kindness meditation, but unless you’ve tried it, it’s hard to describe how it can change your outlook on just about anything in a few short minutes.  It’s quick and easy, takes very little practice to memorize, and you can even do it (although not as effectively) while doing other things - for instance, driving.  I use my loving kindness meditation while driving fairly frequently.  Sometimes I change it up, and wish for all drivers, on all roads, paying attention and not, in a hurry and not….you get the idea.  It’s impossible to work up a good road rage while wishing good things for the other people on the road with you.

In addition to being useful in specific situations - such as taking a deep breath, and silently wishing the person causing you so much frustration at that moment be happy, peaceful and free from suffering - taking a few minutes a day to align your inner self pays as many dividends as the time you take to align your outter self.  Just like I wouldn’t want to leave the house without shaving, putting on deoderant, brushing my teeth and so forth, I can no longer see leaving the house without spending at least a few minutes focused on loving kindness, reminding myself of where I need to be focused today.

When I first came to Buddhism, I wondered what an enlightened person would be like.  Maybe that guy from “Kung-Fu”, with all that way-out “wisdom” that sounded good, but made no sense?  “Together, we will be as strong as a mule with TWO (he holds up 4 fingers) sacks of grain!”  As it turns out, not so much.  So how do you tell someone that is enlightened?  I think perhaps a good measure would be the four immeasurables.

The four immeasureables are also know as the Brahma-vihara, which translates as “The abodes of the Gods”, and they are also sometimes known as “The Four Divine States of Dwelling” or “The Four Perfect Virtues”.  No matter what you call them, they are universally appreciated.

Let’s take a step back and go over my definitions for a moment.  My understanding of Buddhism is that it is a way to end our suffering.  Whether by design or coincidentally, in achieving that, we also become the best human being we can possibly be.  The Buddha told us that we are, in fact, already perfect.  We have all the love, compassion, generosity and wisdom we’ll ever need.  Our job is to strip away the greed, hate and delusion that keeps our perfection from shining through.  So if the goal is to be the best person I can be, how can I measure that?

The four immesurables are metta, karuna, mudita and upekkha.  In English, in the same order, Loving-Kindness, Compassion, Sympathetic Joy and Equanimity.  Wow.  That’s a really short list of qualities for a perfect human being, isn’t it?  I haven’t met many people that demonstrate these qualities consistently.  I know I don’t.  I try.  I’ll improve over time.  But now I have a list of qualities to work with, to measure my thoughts and actions with.  Most cool.

I’ve included the original Pali words here because the translations are not exact, and because of that we may talk about several different ways of looking at these traits.

So this week, my goal is to write a little bit about each of the 4 immeasureables.  I think it will make a nice “welcome back” series, and it will help me to focus on where I am personally with each of them.

As near as I can tell, there isn’t really a Zen of sick, busy and tired.

I do want to ask you all to just bare with me a few days longer - shortly after starting training for the new job, I came down with some sort of sore throat, cough, stuffy head and congested chest sort of thing.  Being able to work from home turned out to be a mixed circumstance, as I was able to complete my training, but doing so prevented me from getting the kind of rest I need to heal when I have this sort of illness.  Even taking antibiotics, my illness has dragged on for almost 2 weeks, and left me with little energy or focus outside of what has been required for work.

I am starting to feel better, so I expect to be back to writing in the near future.

I have enjoyed reading all the wonderful comments during my impromptu hiatus.  It’s a lot of fun seeing what you think about what I think!

Daniel